taboo

Taboos: Is never allowing suicide selfish?

TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE. IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS POST, WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE FEELING SAFE. IF YOU NEED HELP, CLICK HERE.

We want to keep our loved ones around. We don’t want them to hurt. We want to be able to kick it with them until the day they’re six feet under, hopefully by natural causes. So, if our loved ones deal with situations / mental illnesses in which they find themselves feeling like the only escape is suicide, we try to stop them, every time. We create this back and forth from hospital to home, crisis center to home, sometimes many, many times over. There are a lot of people that it gets better for, but…

What about the ones that don’t?

I’ve often heard that suicide is a selfish act. What about everyone else around you? They are going to hurt the rest of their lives. They are going to have to live with what you have done. Why don’t you think about your sister/brother/mother/father/children/best friend/family/loved ones? Why would you do this to them? It will get better. You’re being weak. Only weak people commit suicide. Why can’t you just be stronger?

So many questions, so many hateful statements.

I’ve dealt with my own suicidal problems before, and in fact, I came very close to killing myself on Feb. 9 of this year. I survived, and, for now, I’m glad that I did, but… I go back and forth on it. Though, this post isn’t about me, so lets pull back out to the whole of the topic again.

What’s it like for suicidal people though? Why don’t we look specifically at suicidal thoughts brought on by mental illness. Remember the statement earlier – “It will get better.” Everyone says this, no matter how many times someone has tried, no matter what they get through, “it will get better”, always the positive platitude as if the person saying it knows what the future holds, but the thing is, it doesn’t always get better.

Some people suffer constantly with their mental illness. Some people can’t mitigate it with meds, they just don’t work. Some people are constantly overwhelmed. Some people get small respites, only for hell to come back to them again. Many of those with mental illness have to learn to deal with it their entire lives.

My question is, with situations like that, is it selfish for people to consistently work to keep you from doing it for their own benefit? Is it fair that those around the suicidal person work so hard to keep them alive and make them suffer their chronic illnesses simply because they don’t want to be the ones hurting?

Why is it that we are so damned and determined to stop everyone from taking their own life? What is it that is so incredibly wrong about it? Do people not think about how overwhelming things may be that it actually ends up overriding our self preservation?

Sometimes the reality of it is that things don’t get better. Sometimes the reality is that things get worse. Mental illness can progress continually over years, chipping away at quality of life or ability to even have life.

So the question for the comment section below: Is never allowing suicide selfish?

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7 thoughts on “Taboos: Is never allowing suicide selfish?

  1. I think if someone is in constant pain (physical or emotional) and there’s little or no chance of them getting any better then, yes, it is selfish not to allow suicide. Who are we to condemn anyone to a life of suffering?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The right to end ones life must be a fundamental human right. Surely unless I have the right to do that free of pressure either way, I have no true human rights.

    I think it is right to do everything one can to persuade another not to kill themselves, but never is it right to pressure them with the guilt of the pain their suicide might cause

    I am glad you didn’t kill yourself in February. I hope you will find the will to live this life to the full. Have a wonderful day.

    Michele

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you kindly sunshine, it is definitely a difficult conversation to have. I wish more people would at least be up to discussing it, you know? I also think there’s a huge factor in bodily autonomy as well.
      Thank you for your response and have a beautiful day sunshine ^.^

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I also have to live for the rest of my life with sexual frustration since women rejected me. Does that make their right to refuse my advances less valid? No. My sexual frustrations are my demons. They’re a problem, yes, but no one is obliged to help me solve them.

    The same goes for grief that’s left after suicide. Yes, suicide hurts others. Living also hurts others. Where does consent stop? It’s hypocritical to expect people to respect your rights of bodily autonomy and reject their suicide. It’s not your life and it’s not your body. It’s theirs. If they want to die, respect their decision.

    Liked by 1 person

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