We get these ideas that there are specific traits for people who are introverted, and those who are extroverted. You know: introverted – closed off, doesn’t like conversation, hard to get to know, needs a million hours a day by themselves. Extrovert – never seems to need downtime, very happy to consistantly be around people, total life of the party.
Well… That’s not quite how it works. I mean there are people that fit the stereotypes, but there are many people who don’t.
I’m an introvert, absolutely, I need a lot of my own time, I get anxious around people, I’m not good at small talk, and I often have to fight with actually going out and being around people.
The way I write is the way I talk. I love to interact with people. I need a lot of time with people as well. I’m an introverted social butterfly. I go nuts without hanging out with people, but my anxiety seems to be ready to jump in at any time saying “Hey guys! Good to see you. You’re terrifying. Bye.”
I can very quickly go from THIS IS AWESOME to WAY TOO FUCKING MUCH, RUN.
It’s difficult needing so much space, and so much interaction at the same time. Often, when I am in large groups, I will stay to an edge, near an exit, and hopefully people will talk with me, if not, cool, I get to people watch. When I’m in a smaller group, I’m far chattier, and I will introduce myself, and just be my usual goofy ass self.
I know everyone needs down time, even the most outgoing extroverts, but, seriously?
In terms of want for interaction with people, I’m completely and totally extroverted.
HELL YEAH! LET’S GO TALK AND THINGS!
But in terms of the reality I have to contend with, I need a whole lot of my own personal space, and while intriguing, people are often terrifying. For no other reason then that they exist, apparently.
Overall, I can balance it alright, but nonetheless, it feels so weird being an introverted social butterfly.
Take care sunshines and have a beautiful day!