Until death do us part, while we’re still living

For a long time, I went for the whole long term plan it out idea of relationships. Now, I think that long term commitment is what is killing so many marriages. I mean, here in the US, we have over a 50% divorce rate. This has a multitude of factors, but I think a major one is the wedding vows.

Don’t get me wrong, I hope R and I have a very long relationship, with or without other partners, but I will never pledge any version of the wedding vows to him, and I don’t expect it from him.

We’ve decided that it’s better to wake each day and decide that we still want to be with each other. We’ve both come to the conclusion of never worrying about our relationship status. Either we wake up mutually agreeing to continue our relationship or we wake up deciding to end our relationship.

I think it’s a horrible idea to find a partner and go “Pikachu, I choose you!”

Definitely forever

There are plenty of monogamous and long term relationships that work, but putting a time limit on it seems odd. I would rather be free to love someone until I don’t. Have a relationship that works until it doesn’t. I would rather have a mutual understanding that either or any of us can walk away and it’s okay.

We hope for long term, but there is no way we would bind each other or ourselves to it like that.

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13 thoughts on “Until death do us part, while we’re still living

  1. I like the idea of doing away with term limits on just about everything.

    My husband and I see ourselves in this for the long haul, though we both openly talk about the fact that we’d be able to be okay on our own.

    I think a lot of the 50% statistic comes from people expecting something entirely different when they make the leap to get the rubber stamp of tax approval. They expect things to change, but don’t outline exactly how the change will come about. For my relationship, it was literally one night we were together, but unmarried, then the next night we’d gone to the court house and registered our marriage license. The big thing for us that night was what we were going to have for dinner, and who got control of the remote.

    I’ve also been told by some peers that my husband and I have an unstable relationship that is doomed to fail, because we don’t fight. That the only way to have meaningful communication in a relationship was to have loud, angry arguments. In reality, it is easy enough to communicate like a responsible, civilized adult.

    My friend, you seem to be a grand source for bringing up my own blogging ideas. My fallacies post was brought about by some of the stuff I have read on your blog, so thanks for the inspiration.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow… I… Really? That’s so wonderful, I’m glad I could be of help!
      I’m glad that your relationship is good, it sounds very similar to ours. We have “tiffs” but we don’t fight i.e. scream, yell, bitch, etc…
      We don’t even celebrate the day we got married, we celebrate the day we first got together.
      I’m just blown away that I’m able to help jog ideas for your own blog *blush*

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Honestly? I still have to consult my marriage certificate to be sure of my anniversary date. I do know its in June, though. I like to think that is a good sign of how comfortable we are.

        And of course. Good ideas are gained by people bouncing off of one another, yeah?

        Liked by 1 person

      1. // yeah // go to a motorbike school // and rent one of their little bikes for a month // do the 1 day training not the full course // and then practice yourself in the times when there is no traffic and learn at your own pace. say 2 hours a night // its so cheap // than take the full licence test // they usually train you for that // this way you cut the learning curve // thank you xz

        Liked by 1 person

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